Gender issues in the workplace can be a minefield and they were certainly more challenging some thirty years ago, when women employees were fewer and misogyny all pervasive in many offices. I learnt this the hard way when, briefly, I handled establishment matters in my organisation. There was a litany of complaints against one lady, a Section Officer. No supervisory officer was willing to have her in his department and it fell to my lot to find a suitable slot for her.
Before posting her to some branch, I decided to first meet her and counsel her, if required. My personal secretary warned me. “She is a regular troublemaker, Sir!” he said. ” No matter where she has been posted, she has created trouble.” “What kind of trouble,” I asked. “Well, all kinds,” was the vague answer.
She came for the meeting with an air of disdainful hostility. She was in her late thirties but looked older. After pleasantries, I discussed her work and organisational matters. I discovered that she was quietly confident, intelligent and knowledgeable. She did not say so, but I was convinced that she did not gladly suffer fools. I suddenly realised why she was a misfit – her male colleagues and supervisory officers felt threatened by her!
After thinking the matter over, I posted her to work under the very best branch officer in the organisation. There was an initial howl of protest from him, but things soon settled down. A few months later, I was happy to get glowing reports about her work and dedication. Years passed, and I forgot the so-called troublemaker.
I ran into her at a social gathering last month. She walked up to me and greeted me warmly. She said that she had recently retired after a successful career, for which she thanked me. I expressed surprise that she remembered me at all. “Oh, I remember you well, Sir. You are the reason why I continued in government service,” she said.
I must have looked as puzzled as I felt, because she explained, “Sir, the day I met you, I had decided to quit service because of the environment in the office. I decided not to resign only because you did not ask me what my husband did for a living.”
I wondered what faux pas had I committed. “Oh, my God! I am so sorry. It just never occurred to me to ask. Should I have asked? Is he someone I know?” I blurted out.
Seeing my bewildered expression, she started laughing. “No Sir, That’s just it! I wasn’t married then, and I am not married now. But you were the first person who did not ask me what my husband did. That convinced me that I could exist on my own.”
Quite unwittingly, I had done the right thing! Many a times in life one does not know what one is doing wrong. Serendipitously, there are also times when one does not know what one is doing right!
(Published in The Tribune – July 27, 2023)